Friday Bubbles From My Soapbox

The Republican primary season is now officially open or as we like to say here in Texas, the Running of Lemmings has begun.  I believe the number of candidates is now up to 113 or maybe 132, I’ll have to check my figures. I predict that the upcoming debates will have more people on stage than in the audience.

The latest to throw his name into the ring is former New York Governor George (At Least My Last Name Isn’t Bush) Pataki.  He is most known for having a really dumb last name.  When asked what he brings to the race that is different from the other hundred or so candidates, he said I have a really dumb last name.

Lindsey (I Need Another Mint Julep) Graham, Senaterrible from South Carolina is expected to announce his bid next week.  Lindsey brings a layer of incoherency to the race that is unequaled.  He had this to say this week on his knowledge of foreign policy,   "My family owned a restaurant, a pool room, and a liquor store, and everything I know about the Iranians I learned in the pool room," Even I can’t come up with a punch line on that one.

You sure have to give talk show blowhard Bill (America’s Bully) O’Reilly credit for one thing.  Ole “wife beater” Bill sure knows his audience. He describes his average viewer to a T.  “They are simpletons, unwilling and unable to discipline themselves into formulating a philosophy of life."  Gosh Bill I couldn’t have said it better. 

Stay tuned for future adventures.