Time For Resolutions

Its New Years Eve so here is a quick review of 2014.
365 days
52 weeks
12 months.
Of course for your dog it was,
2555 days
364 weeks
84 months.

We are into the third week here in East Texas of Dish Network’s dropping Fox News from it’s channels and some withdrawal symptoms are starting to show up.  A number of people have reported having fleeting moments of compassion and empathy for their fellow man and others have been seen smiling in public.

One man exclaimed after seeing a picture of Texas Conressmoron Louie (I Really Am as Dumb as I Look) Gohmert in the paper, “What an idiot.” He was taken to a hospital for observation. A woman was un-friended from Facebook after she wrote that she was having second thoughts about voting for Gregg (Hell On Wheels) Abbott for Governor. 

Republican Majority Whip Steve (If Your White You’re Alright) Scalise who said on Monday that he didn’t remember making a speech to a white supremacy group a number of years ago, then on Tuesday said that he did remember making the speech but didn’t know they were a white supremacy group, said today that didn’t remember being a racist and that he didn’t know what one was. He said he voted against a national holiday for Dr. King because he thought they said B.B. King and he wasn’t a big blues fan.

Republican Congressmoron Michael (Boy Am I) Grimm has announced that he will resign from Congress.  He said that after much thought and prayer, plus the fact that he was found guilty of tax evasion, that he would slither back home and hope to not spend too much time in prison.




Stay tuned for future adventures.    

MONDAY boneHEADLINES

North Korean dictator Kim Jong unhappy is certainly filling up the tiny shoes of his daddy Kim Jong il, now known as Kim Jong dead. The media is calling it a War of Words but since he can hardly make a sentence, I think it will be a short war. He is all upset that his internet services have been interrupted a number of times in the past few days.  Sounds like he must have Comcast.  Anyway Kim Jong unwise is mad that people have accused Korea of not having the internet knowledge that the rest of the world has.

Little Kimmy says that he is very knowledgeable about the internet and he predicted that Napster would cause quite a problem for the music industry.  He also said that he has found the internet quite beneficial to him in a number of ways. He said that he just got an email saying that he had won the London lottery and he also had partnered up with a nice man in Nigeria and was helping him get some gold out of that country for a very nice profit.   

There is quite a catastrophe going on here in East Texas.  Dish Network has dropped Fox News and the TeaNut Republicans are having to make up their own lies about what’s going on in the world.

When Meet The Press moderator Chuck (Mr. Milktoast) Todd was asked why he didn’t confront politicians when they told big lies, he said that if he did they wouldn’t come back on the show. Wow, think about that answer for a minute. Well gee Chucky Pooh, why don’t you change the name of the show to “Pander to a Politician” or “Pimping for the TeaNuts.”  At least there would be some truth going on.  Jonny Lang has the perfect theme song for the show.


Stay tuned for future adventures.    

A Few Odds & Ends.

The New York Times is reporting that the winner of the longest winded bonehead in Congress goes to Texas Congressmoron Louie (I Really Am as Dumb as I Look) Gohmert.  Louie abused the ears and brains of his fellow congressmorons some 29 hours this past year.  A number of his fellow congressmorons said that next year they would chose water boarding over Louie’s inane rantings.

 The runner up long winded yacky doodle was Congressmoron Steve (No I Didn’t Write The Shining, but I Almost Wrote a Bill Once) King of Iowa. Steve only wasted some 9 hours harping on things that nobody cared about.  Thanks to my favorite bother-in-law for the heads up.  

I understand that now Sony Pictures has decided to release The Interview in select cities that Kim Jon-unhappy is really upset.  It seems that Pyongyang wasn’t selected.  Of course Pyongyang’s one theater can only run 16millimeter film.

I would also like to say happy birthday to a very special someone who was born on December 25^th.  That would be Isaac (Apple Core, Apple Core) Newton because if he hadn’t discovered gravity, we would all be floating around in space. 



Stay tuned for future adventures.

A Christmas Wish

Here is hoping that all is well with you and yours.

That Santa drops you a bundle on his world tour.

Have a  Merry Christmas and a Happy Holiday

While I go back to bed and sleep until Friday.

Stay tuned for future adventures. 

Monday Blah Blahs

I made the mistake of actually looking at Facebook this week. My usual routine is to open it up and see if I need to say happy birthday to someone, then close it immediately and go to www.theimmoralminority.blogspot.com. and www.juanitajean.com to be informed and entertained by people with knowledge and intelligence.

Anyway I saw a conversation going on about the Sony hacking story and someone wrote that this would have never happened on Reagan’s watch.  Huh! I have to admit that since the internet wasn’t in existence when that bonehead was President the only hacking was done by cigarette smokers, but let’s see what did happen on Ronald (Bad Actor, Really Bad President) Reagan’s watch.

Here is some more bad news on the education front. Not only has college tuition gone through the roof in the last decade, for no apparent reason that I can find, now we Texans find out that Condoleezza (Princess Liar of Iraq Wars) Rice is the front runner to be the next President of the University of Texas. She said if she got the job she would personally head up the Department of Misinformation.

It’s all in the name. I believe that Jed Clampett would make a better President than Jeb Bush.

Did Admiral Byrd and Admiral Perry have a Bi-Polar disorder?

I really don’t understand why anyone would ever take anything Bill (I’m America’s Bully) O’Rielly or Rush (Tiny Brain, Big Mouth) Slimebaugh says seriously because you can go into any neighborhood bar in America and find an overweight, half-drunk, pompous blowhard saying exactly the same things.    



Stay tuned for future adventures.

Random Stuff About Stupid People

Texas Senaterrible Ted (Look At Me, Look At Me) Cruz has really got his panties in a bunch over President Obama normalizing diplomatic relationships with Cuba.  Funny how we have good diplomatic relations with Japan, Germany and Vietnam, but not those mean ole Cubans.  I guess Fidel and his brother could just row over here in a take over the country.  Since little Teddy is half Cuban, I guess he is afraid that his relatives are going to be coming over here asking him for money.  

Conservative blowhard, actually I think she will blow anybody, Ann (Ann Is Short For Andrew) Coulter said this week that that rapes only occur in physically violent circumstances, like “being hit on the head with a brick,” and anyone who says otherwise is just trying to get attention.  Wow and this from someone who will say anything to get attention.  I think we know what kind of a guy Ann was before having everything removed except his Adam’s apple

Talk show host moron, Pat (I Have God On Speed Dial) Robertson said on his 700 Club TV show (That’s how many viewers they have.) that homosexuals “will die out because they don’t reproduce.”   Well gee; I wonder where all those gay people came from? In an extremely long line of stupid things this bonehead has uttered, this could be the best ever.  

Texas Congressmoron Blake (Actually It’s Flake) Farenthold is being sued for inappropriate sexual comments by a former employee. This is no surprise as he is well known to be a total idiot, but here is what I didn’t know: The guy is the real head of Duck Dynasty and here is the picture to prove it.  

Stay tuned for future adventures.

OMG! Not Another One

Former Florida Governor Jeb (What The Hell Kind of Name is Jeb?) Bush of the Bush Dynasty, better known as the Kardashians of politics, has announced he is forming an exploratory committee to see about running for President of the United States.  This means of course that the media will be turning up every horrible detail of brother George’s disastrous eight years in the White House for the next year.  So if you thought you were tired of hearing about the C.I.A. (Creepy Insane Assholes) report, think again.

Jeb explained that the first thing the exploratory group would be seeking for him would be a map so he would know where the White House was located.  They would also be conducting interviews to see if anyone knew what the name Jeb was short for.  They would also be looking for someone dumb enough to risk their political career as his running mate. 
Hump of the week.

Oklahoma Senaterrible Tom(I’m No Will Rogers) Corbun, who, thank god is retiring, is leaving with a perfect record. He has been an asshole since arriving in Washington D.C. and this week he proved he will always be an asshole. Little Tom Dumb placed a hold on the Clay Hunt Suicide Prevention for American Veterans act this week saying that is was just too costly.  Experts believed that the bill would prevent an estimated 22 veterans a day from killing themselves.
 This stupid asshole doesn’t think veterans deserve much of anything.  He once objected to the plans to build a new VA health care facility in his state because that facility was going to be “too nice for the veterans”  If you didn’t know, little Tommy never served in the military and seems pretty dedicated into never serving them.


Stay tuned for future details.