The Miami Dolphins coaching staff decided that offensive tackle Jonathan (I’m Just a Big Ole Teddy Bear) Martin wasn’t mean enough so they asked guard Richie (What concussion? I’m Just Stupid) Incognito to toughen him up by calling Jonathan on the phone and yelling racial slurs at him. Incognito by the way has a bad reputation going all the way back to college which caused a number of teams to pass on him.
Wow what a great plan? What could possibly go wrong….other than Martin quitting the team, Incognito being suspended and the coaches in hot water up to their eyeballs with the league? I didn’t realize that concussions are contagious but they seem to be spreading to the coaching staff.
Then, there was the middle school coach in Portland, Oregon who was fired for taking the team to Hooters for their victory celebration after being told not to by the school and parents. Man, those Hooter addictions are tough to kick.
Speaking of addictions, Toronto Mayor Rob (It Wasn't My Fault, I Was Drunk) Ford who admitted last week that he had smoked crack while in a drunken stupor and this week is fading the heat from a video where he is threatening to kill someone, is considering going to rehab. You think! Boy, I’ll bet Gerald and Betty are rolling over in their graves.
Stay tuned for future adventures.
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