Stuff To Think About

If you haven’t voted yet, here is a last minute run down of some of the main candidates.

On the Republican side we have an Asshole, a Bonehead, a total Moron and a Criminal.  

The Asshole is Gregg (Hell On Wheels) Abbott who wants to be dictator of Texas. As Texas Attorney General he has sued the government 27 times and has lost 23 times costing the state of Texas well over 3 million dollars. He is for cutting millions of dollars out of education and of course doesn’t give a damn about anybody’s health care except his own.

The Bonehead is Dan (I Use to be a Sports Nut, Then I was a Religious Nut and Now I Am Just Nuts) Patrick who wants to be Lt. Dictator of Texas.  Dan told his constitutes that God was speaking to them through the Duck Dynasty TV show.  The Houston Chronicle, which endorsed his opponent Leticia van De Putte, said that Dan was divisive, disruptive and self-aggrandizing. Dan also has a long history of racial comments and slurs and has been named worst Senator in the state legislature every year he has been in Austin.

The Total Moron is Louie (I Am Beyond Dumb) Gohmert who is running for re-election for Congress. Looney Louie went on Christian radio this week and said the reason we shouldn’t have gays in the army is because they will sit around having massages all day and would not be ready to go to battle. That’s so stupid, even I don’t have a snappy comment.

 The criminal is Ken (I’m Above the Law) Paxton.  Kenny wants to be the next Attorney General of Texas. Here is the poop on this creep.

1.       Ken Paxton broke the law when he solicited investment clients without being registered with the Securities Commissioner. (Source: Texas Tribune)

2.      The Texas State Securities Board fined Paxton for failing to register. Existing state law says that failure to register is a 3rd-degree felony, which can result in up to 10 years of jail time. (Source: Austin American-Statesman)

3.      Since news of Paxton's actions broke, his hometown police force withdrew their endorsement of him. (Source: Dallas Morning News). Paxton has not received the endorsement from a single major daily newspaper in Texas, and since winning the primary, he has gone suspiciously silent. 

4.      A Texas group filed a complaint with Paxton on the matter, and he is expected to face investigation after the November election. (Source: Austin American-Statesman).

If he wins, his first case will more than likely be himself.

On the Democrats Side we have three articulate, intelligent women and a man who is not under any kind of criminal investigation.

Wendy Davis….Governor
Leticia van De Putte… Lt. Governor
Shirley McKellar….Congress
Sam Houston….Attorney General
Need I say more?

Faux News co-host of The Five Kimberly (Stepford Wife) Guilfoyle went on the TV and said that young women should not vote. "It's the same reason why young women on juries are not a good idea," Guilfoyle said. "They don't get it!"  What I don’t get is why this ignorant bimbo is on TV.  Oh wait, that is all Faux News hires. Never mind.

Gee, I wonder why nothing gets done in Washington.  Here is what TeaNut Republican Congressmoron Jason (I Don’t Have a Clue) Chaffetz of Utah had to say on Faux News this week when asked about the President’s Ebola response coordinator. He said, “Why not have the surgeon general head this up? I think that’s a very legitimate question. At least you have somebody who has a medical background whose been confirmed by the United States Senate.”   You would have thought someone on his staff would have informed him we haven’t had a Surgeon General in over a year because his obstructionist party has blocked the nomination.  

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Special Saturday Edition

Oh drat, the TeaNut Republicans are having a hissy fit over Wendy (I May Not be the First Lady Governor of Texas, but I Will be the Best) Davis’s latest TV ad. It opens with a shot of an empty wheel chair. Her opponent Gregg (Hell On Wheels) Abbott was paralyzed in 1984 when a tree fell on him proving that even trees don’t like this asshole. Little Greggy Poo sued the owner of the tree and has so far collected $5.8 million and will continue to collect money for the rest of his life. 

 I have no problem with that, but the problem I do have is that Asshole Gregg doesn’t want anyone else to be able to do the same thing. He has supported a number of efforts to make it harder to sue, including a controversial 2003 Texas law that capped non-economic damages in medical malpractice cases at $250,000 and he has fought tooth and nail to block the courthouse door to disabled Texans who sue the state.

This jerk has been running ads with him surrounded by kids and the announcer talking about how important education is for the state of Texas, but in reality, he supports cutting millions of dollars from education. Gregg (Hell On Wheels) Abbott doesn’t give a shit about kids, poor people or women’s health care. Gregg only cares about Gregg.

My reaction to Wendy’s ad is, wow, finally a politician with the courage to tell the truth.



Stay tuned for future adventures.

Hump Day

 Same ole Humps:

The TeaNut Republicans are running an ad here in East Texas that begins with “Wendy Davis is back in the news in another scandal.”  The problem is that Wendy is not back in the news and there never was a scandal.  The incident they are talking about happened back in the spring, you can actually read a date on newspaper picture that is April 18, 2014, and on top of that, nothing came of it. Just some more blatant lies by these assholes, but let’s talk about today.

The Feds have been asked to investigate Texas Attorney General Gregg (Hell On Wheels) Abbott’s involvement in Rick (All Hair, No Integrity) Perry’s Texas Enterprise Fund where they gave away 222 million dollars to friends who didn’t apply or even ask for the money.  These boneheads really should be locked up and go into the history books right beside Ken ( I'd Rather Be Dead) Lay, Jeff (The Smartest Guy in My Jail Cell) Skilling and Alan (Trust Me) Stanford. 

Texas Senaterrible Ted (Will Someone Please Pay Attention to Me) Cruz threw a hissy fit about the Supreme Court not taking up same sex marriage. He said it was “tragic and indefensible,” and went on to say, “This is judicial activism at its worst.” Wow and this is the same bunch of boneheads that a few months back when they gave the thumbs up to Hobby Lobby he thought were doing a great job. Look up hypocrite in the dictionary and you will find this.

Iowa GOP candidate for the Senate, Joni (I'm Really Not) Ernst must be related to Perry and Abbott.  Seems while she was the Montgomery County, Iowa auditor, she awarded contracts totaling 215,665 dollars to her dad’s company. When told the state had a conflict of interest law, she said there was no problem, she and her dad pretty much agree on everything.



Stay tuned for future adventures.

Politicans, Preachers and Pimps

 Actually I don’t have any stories on pimps, I just liked that title.

Congrats to Wendy Davis and Leticia Van de Putte in winning the Democratic primary for Governor and Lt. Governor of Texas. The Democrats now have two very capable and strong candidates to vote for: Now they just have to get out and VOTE. In the last general election, Texas was dead last in voting attendance.

Low voter turnout produces Republicans in office. The Republicans love to talk about New Jersey Governor Chris( Never Burn Your Bridges, Just Close Them) Christie’s landslide win last year in a Blue state.  What they don’t talk about is that the election had the lowest voter turnout in their history.

I can remember when conservative Republicans just hated frivolous lawsuits. Evidently that has changed because now they just love Texas Attorney General Gregg ( Hell on Wheels) Abbott who has sued the Federal Government 27 times and has lost 23 times. Wow, what a record. Ole Gregg has cost Texas millions of dollars in frivolous lawsuits.   Now you know why when you look in the dictionary for the word, hypocrite; it says, see Republicans.

Oh boy another Bush in Texas politics.  George Peckerhead Bush, nephew of George Warmonger Bush, won the Republican primary for Texas Land Commissioner.  I’m not sure young George knows what the Land Commissioner does.  When he first announced he was running for Land Commissioner he said, “Airplanes are a important part of our daily lives and the landing is the most important phase.”

This comes under the heading: Out of the Mouths of Boobs.
Pat (I Have God on Speed Dial) Robertson uttered this little gem yesterday. In an answer to a caller he said, “There’s nothing in the Bible that says you can’t marry your first cousin.”  Well yeah, since the Bible says that Adam and Eve populated the world, I would say there was a lot more incestuous crap going on than just cousins marrying.  He then went on to say, “You don’t want to have some mongoloid child.”
The Mongolian ambassador immediately issued a statement saying Pat would no longer be welcomed in their country. 

This just in:
I did find a story about a pimp.  Former Congressmoron Tom (I Used to be Called the Hammer, Now I’m Just a Tool) DeLay has a new job.  The Washington Times has hired little Tommy to write a column for the paper.  Tom said he would began just as soon as he could find someone to write the column.



Stay tuned for future adventures.

Lone Star Malaise

Lone Star malaise is a condition brought on by the combination of the Cowboys in Dallas, the Texans in Houston and the Politicians in Austin.

The Dallas Cowboys have the worse defense in the NFL and can’t stop anybody from scoring touchdowns.
The Houston Texans have the best defense in the NFL and can’t stop anybody from scoring touchdowns.
Texas has the worse politicians in the country and they keep winning elections.

Here we are wrapping up 2013 and all four of the Republican candidates for Lt. Governor of Texas would like for us to go back to 1713.  Dan (I Was a Sports Nut, but Now I’m a Religious Nut) Patrick, Jerry (I Have a Gun in My Boot and a Stick Up My Ass) Patterson, David (Double Dumb) Dewhurst and Todd (I Don’t Have a Clue) Staples all support the teaching of Creationism in public schools.  Creationism is a religious belief that was dreamed up in 1713 and three hundred years later still has zero scientific data to back it up.  If someone wants to brainwash their child at home with this crap, that is one thing; to teach it in public school is another.  I understand that all four also believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and trickle-down economics.

                                   This is the bonehead who wants to replace this bonehead.

Here are a few things that Gregg (Hell on Wheels) Abbott has done or supported this past year.
•    Turned a blind eye to cronyism allowing millions of dollars for cancer research to be misused
•    Threatened international election observers with arrest and prosecution
•    Supported new restrictive abortion laws and vowed to defend them in court
•    Opposed Medicaid expansion that would have provided health care to 1.4 million Texans
•    Defended the GOP's $5 billion cuts in Texas public school funding
•    Accepted an award from a bigot Dave Welch
•    Claimed "nobody in the state of Texas has done more to fight to help women than I have"
•    Thanked a supporter who called Senator Wendy Davis "retard barbie"
•    Claimed "no problems" caused by Voter ID in the 2013 election - when in fact there were many

Voting for this asshole is simply injecting more poison into the system. Voting for this lady is the antidote. .

Stay tuned for future adventures.