Texas Senaterrible Rafael (I Don’t Have A Clue) Cruz played the “Chicken Little” card and ran around the stage yelling, “They’re going to take away our guns, they’re going to take away our guns.”
Donald (Hair-Brained) Trump told Cruz to shut up and go back home to Canada where he belongs. When Rafael said that he was a natural born citizen, Donnie said there was nothing natural about him. The Don also said after listening to Cruz, he was thinking about building a wall between the U.S. and Canada.
The stupidest quote of the night came from New Jersey Governor Chris (I’ll Close That Bridge When I Get To It) Christie when he said that President Obama was going to get blown out of office in November. Evidently Cissy Poo thinks Obama is running for a third term.
Former preacher, musician, Governor and talk show blow-hard, Mike (I Need A Job) Huckabee said that we should treat poor people the same way we train dogs. I’m sure he found that in The Bible somewhere. Probably in Ignoramus 3:16 where it says," take care of the poor until they shit in the floor."
Senaterrible Lindsey (I Need Another Mint Julep) Graham came out today and endorsed Jeb (At Least I’m Not Neil) Bush for President. Lindsay also said he thought the Houston Texans would win the Super Bowl.
Stay tuned for future adventures.
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