2016

Wow, Hillary (I’ll Be Married To The First Gentleman) Clinton announced that she is running for President.  Man, I didn’t see that one coming.

Texas Seneterrible Ted (Look At Me, Look At Me) Cruz was very upset about Hillary’s announcement. Little Teddy was beside himself for, “her complete and abject failure to mention Jesus. Hillary Clinton sent a very clear message today: she does not intend to bring Jesus with her to Washington,” I understand Jesus had no comment on the matter.

Kentucky Seneterrible Rand (I Have Two First Names) Paul also announced he was running for President.  I thought his announcement was pretty much in tone with his attitude toward the media.

Perennial Presidential loser Rick (I Really Need To Be In A) Santorum told Iowans last week that he found the key to winning his party’s nomination.  He said he has given up his quest to look like Mr. Rogers and burned all of his sweaters. Ricky Poo also said he had formed a testing the waters committee and if could get Jesus to teach him how to walk on water, he would throw his halo into the ring for President once again.   
Little Ricky was also straight forward about his love for fetuses.

Stay tuned for future adventures.