I predicted last Friday that with the CPAC (Creepy Pathetic Assholes Conference) beginning up in Washington that there would be a Bullshit Blizzard hitting the country. Well I was wrong. It was a tsunami of bullshit. Wisconsin’s TeaNut Governor Scott (I Really Don’t Like People) Walker’s compared his state’s protesters to ISIS terrorist and said that he is totally qualified to be President because he watched every episode of The West Wing.
Phil (Head
Donald (Everyday Is A Bad Hair Day) Trump told everyone he can handle ISIS because he is the “world’s greatest negotiator”. I guess he is going invite them to on Celebrity Apprentice and then kick them off.
Texas Senaterrible Ted (Look At Me, Look At Me) Cruz simply asked for a moment of silent prayer for his favorite author, Dr. Spock. Little Teddy said he always loved “The Cat in the Hat.”
Mostly it was a three day rant about Obama to which I think this bumper sticker says it all.
My understanding is that the Guinness Book of Records are looking at this conference as setting the record for the most stupid people ever gathered in one place.
I understand the author of 50 Shades of Grey, the steamy book full of S &M sex, has got some sequels on the way.
50 Shades of Green is about a man who is less than endowed and is obsessed with penis envy.
50 Shades of Red is about a couple who don’t have sex because taking their clothes off is too embarrassing.
50 Shades of Blue is about a depressed man who has been rejected for sex 1,049 times.
50 Shades of Yellow is about a woman who is afraid to have sex.
50 Shades of Black is about is about interracial sex.
There is a small town close to us named Alto. I am shocked that it is not teeming with illegal aliens. You would think that all those folks coming over from Mexico when hitting the city limits of Alto would stop.
Stay tuned for future adventures.
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