Jingle Bell Blahs

 I am out of pocket today so I thought I would throw a rerun at you.  I wrote this a few years back and it seems to work just as well in 2015.

Well Hanukkah is over so at least no more Hanukkah music.  Now if I can manage to get through the next few weeks of Christmas music and television shows with my sanity intact, I will have survived yet another Holiday season.

This is not as easy a task as it sounds since every radio station in the United States will be playing Xmas music 24/7 and there will be a continuous stream of worn out Christmas programs.  When I say worn out, I do mean worn out.  How many years have we been watching “Rudolf, the Red Nose Raindeer”, “Charley Brown’s Christmas”, “Frosty The Snowman” or “The Ginch Who Stole Christmas” and etc?  My point is, here we are in the midst of High Definition and 3-D TV and the networks are running 40 year old animation at us.  Are they that greedy that they can’t come up with something new?

Probably the main reason I’m really into the “Bah Humbug” this year is that my wife and I discovered a beautiful 350 year old village in Mexico called San Miguel de Allende a number of years ago and began spending the last couple of weeks of the year down there.  It is located in the mountains of central Mexico about 2 hours north of Mexico City.  Only in the last couple of years did we even see a Christmas tree or any hint of the yule tide greetings.

It is a small, lovely laid back place that is an absolute paradise for writers and artist, which we both can qualify.  We have dreamed of moving there, at least part time for quite a while.  We are not going this year because the drug cartels decided to have a war.  Being the peaceniks that we are, we're staying as far away from it as possible. Even though San Miguel has no problems, getting there and back is not something we care to chance at this time.

So here we are surrounded by tra-la-la’s, jingle this and buy that, until we could puke.  Christmas does not have a significant religious tie to us and the over-commercialization by the retail world is very offensive. The advertising world insists through guilt and manipulation that we should show that love with large quantities of gifts.  I say, for that much togetherness we need large quantities of alcohol.   

I know we must both sound like Mr. and Mrs. Scrooge but we really are nice folks who just get over-whelmed with the season (in fact we just can’t find a reason for the season) and this year we aren’t getting to make our escape.  Bah Humbug……..

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Signs of Christmas

It’s that time of the year and let’s be honest.  Here is the real reason for the season.

And for the question who is the world’s most famous fictional character?

Uh oh, it looks like somebody’s number is up.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Hump Day

 Oh look, Christian Humps.

Pastor Steven (Another Pinhead In A Pulpit)Anderson of the Faithful Word Baptist church in Tempe, Arizona  says women shouldn’t read books of their choosing, dress how they like, have sex, acknowledge the existence of men apart from their husband, publicly speak and that they must always obey their husbands.

Dr. Ashley E. Ray, I’m pretty sure the E stands for eegit, who is senior pastor of Ridgeway Baptist Church of Memphis, told his congregation last week that women needed to submit to their husbands in all things, and that the "feminist rebellion" was responsible for many of the problems the country was facing.

Arkansas Pastor Jeff (I Swear To God I'm A Idiot) Crawford said that a woman has no "right over her own body" because it is owned by God.

Here is what I don’t understand. Why don’t these assholes move to Iran or Saudi Arabia because that is exactly how they treat women?

The next time I hear some idiot Texas secessionist say he wants to leave America, I going to tell him I will gladly help him pack. 



Stay tuned for future adventures.

A Few Things I've Pondered Over The Weekend

-NRA (National Rabid Assholes) say more guns make us safer.

-Statistics say America has the most guns and the most mass shootings.

-Texas Senaterrible Rafael (I Don’t Have A Clue) Cruz says “the only way to take down a bad guy with a -gun is a good guy with a gun.”

-In 355 mass shootings this year, not a single good guy with a gun has stepped up and taken down a bad guy with a gun.

-Guns don’t kill people.

-The medical examiner in every mass shooting in the U.S says that every victim died from a gun.

The 2^nd Amendment is 224 years old.  Too bad it wasn’t written by Apple because it would have been updated at least 224 times by now and possibly make some sense.  

I know what Kay Jewelers ads say, but the jewelers here in East Texas say that every kiss begins with the lips and then comes the tongue.

Washington D.C. unveiled the new statue of Darth (I Really Am A Dick) Cheney last week and I must say the likeness is unbelievable.

The latest survey of the Republican candidates for President revel that

31% of Republican voters are extremely stupid

16% of Republican voters are just plain dumb

9%   of Republican voters think Tom Cruise is running for President

7%   of Republican voters think that Marco (I Have A Sugar Daddy) Rubio invented the Rubix cube.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Guns R’ Us

So this week’s mass shooting in California was the 355^th of the year and the key word to remember here is SHOOTING.  It was not the 355^th stabbing, bludgeoned to death with a bat, golf club, big stick or tire iron, strangled, poisoned, run over with a car, bus or train. No, it was done with a GUN.  I noticed that the media hasn’t said what “well regulated militia” the shooters were a member of.  Come to think of it, they haven’t said that about any of the mass shooters in the last twenty years. Isn’t that interesting?

Let’s face it folks, the TeaNut Republican answer to all of this crazy shit of praying not get shot is not working. Evidently the TeaNuts believe gun rights are more important than the right to live.  I think it is time for America to quit being number one in the world in mass shootings.  My Xmas wish for Ted (My I.Q. And My Gun Are Both 44’s) Nugent and his gun nuts buddies out there is to please take their head out of their ass and replaced it with the 2^nd amendment.





Stay tuned for future adventures.

An Open Letter To Congress

Please get your head out of your ass and your hands out of the pocket of the NRA and actually do something by doing the right thing.


 Yours truly,
Rod Tanner


Stay tuned for future adventures.

To Sin Or Not To Sin

 But it sure as hell is legal.

Trying to wrap your head around some of the nonsense in The Bible is like trying to hold on to fog.  It’s simply impossible.  Let’s talk about sin. According to the Good Book, it is a sin to get a tattoo. This is a good one because I think about every third person on the planet has a tattoo now days. I especially like that it is sin to eat shell fish.  I’ll bet God cringes every time he sees one of those Red Lobster endless shrimp ads on TV.

So when is it that a sin is no longer a sin?  According to religious scholars there are about 125 sins listed in the Bible, but if you listen to the TeaNut Religious wackos you would think there are only 3 or 4. At least that’s all you hear about. What I don’t get is why some of them are simply ignored and some of them are ranted about continually. I have the feeling that a lot of pseudo Christians have purchased this little item I found here.  

Stay tuned for future adventures.