Monday Morning Musings

Tiger Woods may be back on the dating scene again but so far he hasn’t even flirted with winning a golf tournament.

Charlotte County Sheriff's deputies arrested 22-year-old Robert Tuttle on Thursday for allegedly threatening his mother with an axe and forcing her to watch movies with him for several hours. Now he shouldn’t have threatened her with an axe, but making her watch three Ashton Kutcher movies is just unforgivable. 

Harry Wesley Coover Jr., known as the inventor of Super Glue, has died at his home in Kingsport, Tenn. He was 94. His family said he had stuck with it as long as he could.

Four more radio stations dropped Glen Beck’s radio show last week and his ratings are off 50% from a year ago. It just goes to show you can fool some of the people some of the time but a fool with a radio show won’t fool em’ for long.

Wow, Kentucky, Virginia Commonwealth University, University of Connecticut and Butler are in the Final Four.  It doesn’t get much more exciting than that…Actually it does; reruns of Matlock would be more fun.  March Madness has dribbled off into March Mediocre…

Now here is a headline for you.  HOUSTON  — A deaf man has been accused of biting off part of another deaf man's ear.  Well it’s not like he bit off his fingers.  




Stay tuned for future adventures

Forget 4G

When I first started hearing and seeing all of the ads on TV about the new 4G phones, I thought wow, the G surly stands for Grand or Galactic and we could phone outer space or other planets.  Then I thought maybe the G stands for Glamorous or Glitter so we could talk to our favorite movie and television stars.  Another thought was that the G must be for Genius and it is a hundred times smarter than a smart phone.

Then it hit me, with the enormous amount of money they are spending promoting 4G, it must stand for Godly and we would have a hot line directly to heaven.

But alas after much research on the subject, the G must stand for GOUGE as in to cheat out of money or overcharge.  Then again it could be GREEDY because 4G doesn’t do anything that the phone in your hand doesn’t do right now.

And Now For Something Completely Different.

Lindsay Lohan's father has been arrested. He said he wanted to spend more time with his daughter.

I just read a story that said Tiger Woods was back on the dating scene.  As far as I can tell he was never off the dating scene but now he’s not MARRIED.

HBO has announced they are doing a movie on the life of former Vice-President Darth Cheney.  It will open when Darth was a teenager and shot his best friend with a BB gun.  Shortly after that Darth had the first of his 23 heart attacks which is an incredible number for someone who obviously doesn’t have a heart.


Stay tuned for future adventures.