An Open Letter

To all members of the NRA, quasi-pseudo militia wackos, chicken-shit open carry assholes and all paranoid delusional gun nuts everywhere.

TAKE YOUR 2^ND AMENDMENT AND STICK IT UP YOUR ASS.

Yours truly,

Rod Tanner

P.S.

And to all of the haters.

FUCK YOU TOO.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Friday's Bubbles From My Soap Box

So here is a little something to ponder the next time you hear a NRA (Feverous Rabid Asshole) member rail on about how we need everyone carrying a gun to make America safer.  Yes sir, just like in the old wild west days. Two of the most famous places in our wild west history are Dodge City, Ka and Tombstone Ar, and there are plenty of accounts of how Wyatt Earp and his brothers tamed those two cities.  THEY TOOK AWAY EVERYBODY’S GUNS.  Yep when you came into town, you had to check your guns at the sheriff’s office.  Now if that doesn’t make a far-right gun-packin’ TeaNut Republican’s head explode, I don’t know what will.

You can always tell who the NRA member is in an AA meeting. He is the one to who says, “Hi, I’m Bill and I’m an alcoholic and I think the solution to our problems is more alcohol.  

One of the big mysteries of life to me and this could be bigger than why did the chicken cross the road, is why does Wolf (Clueless) Blitzer have a job?  Everybody knows that Fox News is simply the media arm of the Republican Party, they have an agenda to lie and give misinformation about President Obama and the Democrats and they do a good job of it.  CNN on the other is hand is simply incompetent.

Texas Governor Gregg (Hell On Wheels) Abbott announced that Texas would cut Planned Parenthood funding out of Medicaid and then yesterday state health department goons served subpoenas for patient records and for Planned Parenthood employees home addresses. Of course all of this is based on fraudulent videos made by an anti-abortion group of assholes.

This proves to me without a doubt that Gregg Pooh was hatched. Surly this asshole doesn’t have a mother. Yes I know he has a wife, but I understand she is from Stepford. I just don’t get why this jerk hates women.  It would make sense for him to hate trees, after all a tree fell on him and put his sorry ass in that chair for the rest of his miserable life.  

  Open letter to the Republicans of the Bengahzi panel.

Dear Assholes,
FUCK YOU and the narrow minded, intolerant, ignorant, mean-spirited, backward, racist, homophobic, misogynist and elitist asshole of an elephant you rode in on.     
Yours truly,
Rod Tanner




Stay tuned for future adventures.

Bubbles From My Soapbox

Guns may be more persecuted than Christians

Guns are under attack again and we all know because the fine folks in NRA (National Rabid Assholes) and all of the politicians that they have in their pocket have told us over and over again that guns don’t kill people, people kill people.  So I have come to the conclusion that the only way to save the gun is to get them away from all those mean ole mentally ill owners.  

I know it’s a big job, but we can do this if we all pull together. We need to find a place where all those nice guns can live and not be made to do those terrible things by their owners. Maybe someday after we have developed a really rigid and strict means of vetting owners, that we can let a few guns have owners once again.

Of course the TeaNut Republican’s answer all of these shootings is very similar to their health care plan.  Pray that you don’t get shot.

I don’t know who those boneheads in Loseranna think they are, but, here is the real Duck Dynasty.

Enlightenment is not always pretty.  Like finding out that some of those so called friends on Facebook are actually misogynistic, homophobic, racist assholes. 
  

The National Association of Native Americans said that their estimate of illegal aliens in the country is around 315 million.   

Texas Attorney General Ken (I Fought The Law and The Law Won) Paxton’s lawyer quit yesterday.  I understand Ken has been inquiring about hiring Johnny Cochran. I hope nobody tells him Johnny is Jesus’s lawyer now.




Stay tuned for future adventures.

Mid-Week Blah Blahs

Don’t you just love the boneheads who think the answer to their problems is to secede? 

Then when a disaster strikes their chants of SECEDE turn into WE NEED!

South Carolina Senaterrible Lindsey (Dr. Doom, We’re All Gonna Die) Graham set the world record for the most negative, pessimistic, foreboding announcement speech ever made.  Little Lindsey said, the world is falling apart and he wanted to be President when it does.   Of course loopy Lindsey knows he hasn’t got a chance in hell of being President, but he just can’t pass up jumping on the money bandwagon like the other 113 Republican losers who are doing the same thing.

Just when you thought the NRA (Nefarious Rabid Assholes) couldn’t possibly do anything dumber.  It seems they are very upset that a mentally disabled or domestic abuser isn’t allowed to have guns.  I mean after all the second amendment doesn’t say anything about the mentally ill or wife beaters not being able to pack whatever kind of heat they want, especially when the little woman has burned the toast again.  It really gives a whole new meaning to “Gun Nut” when you think about it.  

 

 

 

Now that the Patriot Act is kaput, here is the question that is on everyone’s lips.  Does Tom ( My Balls Always Have Plenty Of Air) Brady still have to report to Guantanamo Bay?

 

Now that the Texas Legislature in all of their wisdom have decided to allow guns on college campuses, one might think about avoiding next year's University of Texas and Texas A&M shoot out. 

 

Stay tuned for future adventures.

The Walking Dumb...Part 2

Politicians love attention and I think maybe New Jersey Governor Chris (I’m Not Overweight, I’m Overwrought) Christie may have hit the jackpot.  He is now the center of seven different investigations. 

 

House Whinner John (It’s My Party and I’ll Cry if I Want Too) Boehner plans on suing President Obama because he thinks the Prez has abused his power of executive order.      Here's a list of executive orders used since little Ronnie (Bad Actor, Really Bad President) Reagan was in office.
Ronald Reagan: 381
George Bush: 166
William J. Clinton: 364
George W. Bush 291
Barack Obama 168

Bonehead Boehner obviously failed math in school.

 

The NRA (National Rabid Assholes) believes that obsessed wackos and wife beaters should have the right to own guns just like every other gun nut in the world.  You see there is proposed legislation that would prohibit people convicted of stalking and domestic violence from owning guns and they are against it.  After all, owning a gun is a God given right.  I believe it says so in Smith & Wesson, 38-45. Like Phil (Duck DickHead) Robertson says, if Jesus had had a gun, there wouldn’t be any of this crucifixion shit.

 

 I do have a couple of questions for the members of the NRA (Notoriously Ridiculous  Assholes). What well regulated militia are you a member of and when was the last time you had to take your precious gun and defend yourself from the United States Government?  Patriots of the Revolutionary War rebelled against a government of another country. Evidently gun nuts of today missed that section of American history.  Maybe home schooling isn’t all it’s cracked up to be? 

 

Arizona school superintendent John ( I Am A Equal Opportunity Offender) Huppenthal has apologized for posting anonymous hurtful blog comments.  It appears that he has a long history of making offensive and often racist comments about the poor, Hispanics, Blacks, Planned Parenthood, and others.  I understand Arizona Governor Janice Kooky Brewer has really come down hard on ole John.  She made him write “I Will Not Be An Asshole Anymore’ a hundred times on the blackboard. 

 

Texas Congressmoron Louie (I Really Am As Dumb As I Look) Gohmert was so pissed about all of the unaccompanied children coming across the Texas border that he had to go on the floor of the House and rant about it.

 Of course if these were fetuses, then he would down there welcoming them with open arms.

 

I haven’t watched any of the World Cup but I did hear about the player who bit another player and was kicked out.   I didn’t even know Mike (How Do You Like These Toothers) Tyson was playing soccer now.  

Speaking of the World Cup, Faux News faux psychiatrist Dr. Keith Ablowhard is claiming the reason so many people in America are watching is because it is a conspiracy by President Obama to distract attention from him.  This so stupid it does even deserve one of my wise ass comments.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Wednesday Humps With Guns

 The big gun-fight is on. The good news is that it’s between two gun organizations. The NRA and Open Carry Texas, two groups of gun nuts who symbolically substitute the lead in their bullets for the lack of lead in their pants  Right away they’ve been shooting their mouths off at each other. The NRA put out an statement saying that Open Carry Texas was just plain weird, so Open Carry Texas came back and said “The NRA is nothing but a money whore corporation.”  Hey they are both right.

At one time in my life the NRA (National Rifle Association) was all about hunters and gun safety, but somewhere along the line they changed to the NRA (National Rabid Assholes) and could care less about gun safety. Selling more guns is their only priority.

In my opinion, there are two kinds of gun owners; legitimate hunters and gun nuts. Legitimate hunters own shotguns and rifles. Gun nuts own every kind of gun possible, especially hand guns and semi-automatics.   To my knowledge, every mass shooter so far has come from the gun nut side of the ledger. 

Speaking of guns, Joni (My Mentor is Michele Bachman)Ernst, who is a Republican running for the U.S. Senate from Iowa, has called the mass shooting in California two weeks ago an accident. An accident?  The guy shot and stabbed seven people to death.  What did he do, kill the wrong people?   She is just another example of a pimp for the NRA saying something really stupid.  I find it amazing that these people can still manage to stick their foot in their mouth while having their head up their ass at the same time.

And the gun owner of the week is an old fart in Minnesota who pulled a gun on his neighbor because he didn’t like the way the neighbor was teaching his daughter how to ride a bicycle.  Mr. Gun Nut was arrested on second degree assault charges. He told police that he had been drinking all day but said it didn’t influence his actions.  He said Jesus said, “Give a person a ride and they will hound you for more, but teach them how to ride a bicycle and they are out of your life forever”.    

Stay tuned for future adventures.