50 Shades Of Stupid

After the video of the Oklahoma University frat boys singing a song with racial slurs went viral, the Governor issued a statement saying that Oklahomans were not racist, they just didn’t like black people.  The Oklahoma state legislature condemned the video immediately saying the camera work was shaky and that it was hard to understand the words.  Oklahoma TeaNut Senaterrible Jim (I’m Not A Scientist, But I Am A Moron) Inhofe, who believes Climate Change is a hoax, said that he thought the video was a fake.  He said he had seen the Broadway musical Oklahoma nine times and he didn’t remember that song.

Former Texas Governor Rick (All Hair, No Integrity) Perry was running his mouth at a Republican fundraiser last week and said, “Thomas Paine wrote that ‘the duty of a patriot is to protect his country from his government.”  The problem is that Thomas Paine didn’t say that. I’m pretty sure it was Richard Thomas on The Waltons. Ricky pooh thought that John Boy was the coolest.

Florida Governor Rick (I Really Am As Creepy As I Look) Scott is a TeaNut Republican who believes in freedom of speech except for those words he doesn’t like.  He has banned the employees of the EPA in Florida from using “global warming” and “ climate change.”  Little Ricky also doesn’t like or believe in the words, honesty, integrity, and truthfulness.

Utah state Represenitive Paul  (Not Only Am I A Mormon, but I’m Also A Moron) Ray has sponsored a bill to use firing squads instead of lethal drugs. He said he would bring in Donald (I Have A Bad Hair Day Everyday) Trump to do the honors. He said nobody says “you’re fired” like the Don. 



Stay tuned for future adventures.

Random Thoughts From a Disorganized Mind

The 114 Congress has only been in session three days and they have already set a record.  For the first time in history, the majority of members of Congress are millionaires.  Well isn’t that just ducky.  From now on I think we should refer to congressmorons as members of the Penthouse of Represenitives and the Senaterribles as belonging to the Senate Manor.   

Let’s look at some numbers.  There are approximately 360 million people living in America and a little over 9 million have a worth of 1 million dollars.  In Congress, of the 534 members, 268 are millionaires. Gee I wonder which group of people gets the most representation.

It seems that Louie (I Really Am As Dumb As I Look) Gohmert bid to take the Speaker of the Penthouse job has fallen a little short. Actually it didn’t get off the ground high enough to fall.  Looney Louie got three votes of which one was his own.  Now the burning question is who are the two dipshits that voted for this fool?

The new chair of the Senate Environment and Public Works Committee is Oklahoma Senaterrible Jim( Gohmert is Dumb, I’m Just Plain Stupid) Inhofe.  This bonehead believes that Climate Change is hoax and is a member of the Flat Earth Society.  As Jimbo likes to say, “I ain’t a scientist but I can look out my front door and see that the earth is flat.” After all, this pinhead is from a state whose motto is Oklahoma is Okie Dopey.  A state by the way that won’t even talk about gun safety but is thinking about outlawing hoodies.  Yeah, that’ll fix things.

North Texas reported 9 small earthquakes this week but come to find out it was just aftershocks from New Jersey Governor Chris (I Don’t Burn Bridges, I Just Close Them) Christie jumping up and down in Jerry Jones private box at the Dallas Cowboy game Sunday.

Yesterday was Elvis Presley’s 80^th birthday. I’ve noticed there haven’t been any sightings of Elvis in quite a while. I hope he is not sick.



Stay tuned for future adventures.