Friday, April 26, 2013

Bush Library:All Fiction

With the opening of his Presidential library, George W. Bush is back in the news again and there is much talk of him trying to salvage his legacy.  I didn’t like W when he was Governor of Texas and I didn’t vote for him for President, but I will say publicly that what I said about W when he first won the Presidency was wrong.  I said, “Well, he can’t be that bad.”  I was totally wrong. 

This asshole was the worst President in history as far I as I am concerned. Two uncalled for wars, a financial crisis that almost sunk the country, the Katrina fiasco and a failed education plan (No child left of center) puts him at the bottom of the heap, and folks we have had some pretty bad Presidents.  Why this jerk and his buddies, Darth Cheney and Donald Dumbsfield, are not cell mates for war crimes is beyond me.   


I’m all for re-examining his time in office. I think there is even more incompetence that hasn’t been brought to the surface, but I have to admit they did do a great job in building a library that really reflects the image of his eight long years in office.



 Remember when W said, “I’m the decider,” well there is an interactive room for visitors to see how W made his important decisions.  It consists of a dartboard, a hat full of suggestions and a coin to flip. Speaking of decisions, W choked up and got teary-eyed when speaking about Katrina yesterday.  By my calculations, he was 7 years and 8 months too late on that decision.


Surely there is something W gave us that’s good?  Oh yeah, the oxymoron “compassionate conservative”.  When asked if Laura was going to be the head librarian, he said, “Oh no, she’s Lutheran”.  

As always, former Presidents show up at the newest Presidential library for the mandatory picture taking session.  One of them seems to be having more fun than the rest.



 Thanks to Juanita    www.juanitajean.com for this great snapshot.



 Stay tuned for future adventures.

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Let The Games Begin

The finger-pointing blame-game of mistakes made in the lead up to the Boston bombing is now being played by the posing, preening, pontificating politicians.  These sorry excuses for public servants known as the Do-Nothing Congress are the same boneheads who could have done something a few weeks ago by voting for more stringent background checks or for attending to the sequester debacle they created.  Yet here they are, hogging a microphone at every chance so they can spew their inane rhetoric and create more drama so they don’t have to do their real job.

One reason they want to clutter up the airways ranting about the bombings is to cover up the latest stunt that these sleazy members of Congress pulled off.  They just voted to gut the Stock Act so that they could continue to make millions off of insider trading, which of course is totally illegal for anyone else to do.  

I get it why both Alaska senators — Democrat Mark Begich and Republican Lisa Murkowski voted against background checks for guns even though Alaska has the highest death rate from guns than any other state in the union.  I’m pretty sure they thought someone would shoot them if they voted for background checks.

Most people thought Senator Max Baucus of Montana voted against background checks for buying guns because he was up for re-election.  Turns out he wasn’t worried about being re-elected after all since he announced today that he is not running for office next year.  Obviously, he’s just another NRA Yes-Man who thought not having the gun owners inconvenienced in any way took precedence over savings lives.

The shame of all of this is that we, the American public, have a large responsibility in this situation.  We keep sending incompetent people to Washington D.C and then are upset that they turn into greedy power-hungry Congressmorons and Senaterribles.


If you’re not feeling the effects of the economic recovery of the last couple of years, this is probably the reason why.   The Pew Research Center released a report today saying that mean net worth for the 7 percent of American households at the top of the wealth distribution rose by 28 percent between 2009 and 2011 and the mean net worth for the other 93 percent of American households fell by 4 percent during that period.


Charges have been dismissed against the man who was thought to have sent ricin-tainted letters to President Obama and others.  Once authorities discovered he was from Mississippi and was an Elvis impersonator they said he probably couldn’t write and most likely wouldn’t know who was President.


Former South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford who is now running for a Congressional seat is finding that hiking the campaign trail is little more difficult than hiking the Appalachians. 





Stay tuned for future adventures.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Down To Earth

Yesterday we celebrated Earth Day #43.  Boy it feels like earth is older than that, but oh well; it sure was a nice day.  I like Earth.  I think it is probably my favorite planet of them all; for sure it’s the best one to live on.  I have talked to a number of people who were obviously from another planet, though I don’t know which one because I never thought to ask.

Earth seems to get along with the other planets since we have not gone to war with any of them.  From what I can tell we are a little more advanced than the other planets.  I don’t read of any new inventions or new technology coming from Mars, Jupiter or Uranus. 

There are a few things to show how Earth leads all the other planets: Mars candy bars, Mercury and Saturn automobiles and Moon Pies are all made exclusively here on Earth and every movie made by Universal Pictures was shot right here.

Obviously we earthlings are much more beautiful than anyone else in the universe.  I mean we have won the Miss Universe contest every single year it has been in existence.

I also like that Earth is now round as opposed to the early years when it was flat. I think it probably makes a better picture from outer space and I felt sorry for those people who kept falling off the edge.



Stay tuned for future adventures.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

There's No Place Like Home

Now that I have RETURNED from our little trip to the lake, I feel
Refreshed, revitalized, realigned, refurbished, rehabilitated, rejuvenated, recuperated, relaxed, renewed, resurrected and regenerated so that I can go back to being RETIRED.





The Senate had a Charlton Heston moment this week as they voted down the gun measure before them.  They said it was going to take a lot more than just a mere twenty first graders being murdered to pry their icky sticky fingers off of their beloved guns.
I find it interesting how two different polls indicated that 91% of the country wanted background checks and more gun control.  The vote was 54 to 46 which means that 46 of the Senators decided to represent 9% of the country.



 Of course now that we know that pressure cookers were used in the Boston Marathon bombing, I am waiting for legislation to begin on outlawing pressure cookers completely or at least background checks before you can buy one.  My money is on either Congressmoron Louie Gohmert or Beaumont BoneHead Reprensentive Steve Stockman to begin clamoring about the dangers of pressure cookers and how they are menace to society. 


Twitter proves that people are able to be intelligently succinct and concise while being incredibly mean and stupid, all in 140 characters or less.


Stay tuned for future adventures.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

On The Road Again

My sweetie and I are on another little road trip.  We are headed up to Possum Kingdom lake for a week of lifting nothing heavier than a fork. 






Stay tuned for future adventures.

Friday, April 5, 2013

Some things that ran through my brain and came out my computer

Kim Jong un is still acting like the spoiled brat that he is.  I’m beginning to think it would have been a lot better for the world if Kim Jong il had passed the torch to his daughter Kim Jong Kardashian



Big news in late night TV announced this week.  Jimmy Fallon will be taking over the “Tonight” show from Jay Leno.  If you’re a Jimmy Fallon fan and are concerned that the same thing will happen to Jimmy that happened to Conan O’Brien after he took over for Jay last year, don’t worry.  Jimmy has already been offered a deal at TBS when Jay comes back in nine months and kicks Jimmy out.


Lots of talk in the news about the Aryan Brotherhood.  Is that a code name for the Republican Party?  I mean aren’t they a bunch white guys who spew hateful things about minorities. 


On May 1st we will have a new oxymoron:  George W. Bush Library.



.
Stay tuned for future adventures.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Hump Day

More problems for Justin Bieber.  This week German officials confiscated his pet monkey.  I understand he was spankin’ it.


Michelle Malkin, far-right wing nut columnist and Siamese twin of Tea Party drag queen, Ann Coulter, (oh I don’t mean they are joined at the hip, just asshole buddies) threw a hissy fit this week at Google for honoring Cesar Chavez.  She thought the picture they put up was of Hugo Chavez. So as usual, Michelle was totally, 100% DEAD WRONG.   I’m still laughing.


Baseball season officially started on Sunday. Baseball is the Herman (999) Cain of sports. There are 9 to a team, 9 innings, 9 strikes to retire a side and like Herman, is entertaining for about 9 minutes.



Dancing with the Stars judge Len Goodman told Wynonna Judd  "Well, you're like Mount Rushmore," and D.L. Hughley,  "D.L, if you're the sex machine, I'm 'America's Next Top Model.”  I’m pretty sure Len is a Republican.


The NRA-backed National School Shield program was unveiled yesterday.  It has one recommendation on how to protect schools from instances of violence. We simply combine the schools and prison systems.   

The prisons already have trained guards with guns and we know exactly where all the criminals are at all times.



Nelson Georgia, population about 1400, has passed a law requiring its citizens to own a gun and ammunition. The law contains no penalties, has exemptions for felons and the mentally ill and allows anyone to opt out.  There have been no violent crimes in Nelson in over ten years but the City Council said they wanted to make a point about gun laws.
They made a point alright, but it wasn’t about gun laws.

.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Monday, April 1, 2013

We're In The Money Now

Stocks closed out the first quarter with the Dow logging its strongest quarter in 15 years and the S&P 500 closed at it's highest level in history.  Are ya feeling richer? Ok, how about this? The S&P has recovered all its losses from the financial crisis.

What? You’re not laughing all the way to the bank, lighting cigars with hundred dollar bills and pouring champagne by buckets full.  That could be because 50% of all stock is owned by the top 1% of the country.  Yes. 1% and I’m betting not a single person reading this right now is part of the 1%.  This might get your attention: 80% of all the stock is owned by the top 10% of the country.  Anybody out there in the top ten percent?  I thought not, but there could be somebody out there reading this that works at Wal-Mart so I thought I would let you know that Mike Duke, your CEO, makes 1.034 times as much as you according to this article:  http://huff.to/11W3sza  

I’m pretty sure he loves the stock market right now.

When conservatives spout off more Americans own stock than ever before, they are talking about shares not wealth.  If you have one share of stock you are included in the stock market.  Whoopee!  The wealth is totally controlled by the top ten percent.

And as a final note, Moebs Services, a respected economic research firm, issued a report last week that shows overdraft revenue at banks, credit unions and thrift institutions totaled $32 billion last year. That’s an increase of $400 million or 1.3 percent from 2011.

So excuse me if I tune out when the media makes a big deal about how great the banks and Wall Street is doing.

Stay tuned for future adventures.