Apples And Apples

Today is National Eat a Red Apple Day.  Just think if Eve hadn’t eaten that apple we would all still be walking around naked and if an apple hadn’t fallen on Newton’s head, he wouldn’t have discovered gravity and we would all be floating around in space naked.

The Bible refers to apples as the “forbidden fruit.”  I’m pretty sure the 11^th commandment was “Thou shall not eat apples.” But since it didn’t make the top ten, you can thank Moses for apple pie.

The apple is credited with being the first to say “bite me.” We also honor this fruit with, “He’s the apple of my I-phone,” and “An apple a day will keep the doctor away, unless you have his number.”    

Also it’s December 1^st, so let the gifting guilting begin.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

50 Shades of Black Friday

I can remember when if someone said something about Black Friday, they were talking about Robinson Crusoe’s buddy, but not anymore. Black Friday is the code word for shop til you drop or til your money runs out. Black Friday is supposed to be the day that you get the best deals on shopping, but the truth is that is just a myth.  The actual best deals are always found the day after Christmas.

I will not be participating as there are a number of things which register higher with me than Black Friday. Things such as: Black Jack, Black Eyed Peas, Black widow spiders, Black Keys, Blacklist, Black President, Blackball, Black Eye, Black Sheep, Black Power, Black Market, Blackbird, Blackboard, Black Sea, Blackberry, Blacksmith,  Blackout, Black magic, Black light, Black Eyed Susan, Blacktop, Blackmail and of course


Black Friday's wife.


Stay tuned for future adventures.

Tiny Bubbles From My Soapbox

I haven’t said anything about the terrible stuff going on in Ferguson because it is uncomfortable to talk about, but I think that is one of the big problems with this whole situation because it is so awkward to discuss racial issues and because conversations become heated quickly.

For many years when I would read about police incidents like this, I wrote it off as a few bad apples in the police dept.  Now I have come to think there are a few good apples and plenty of bad ones. I believe this because I truly think being a policeman is one of the most difficult and hardest jobs there is.  It takes a really special person, one who can control his emotions in stressful times and someone who has lots of compassion and common sense. Unfortunately there are few people who have the right qualities for this kind of job. I know I don’t.

So what we have are people who are the least likely to do the right job being the ones most attracted to the job: asshole bullies, of which most are racist. They love to be policemen where they can legally bully and feel that they are above the law.

I believe this is much the same scenario of why we have so few good politicians.  I’m gonna take my soapbox and go back to bed now.      



Stay tuned for future adventures.   

Offical Book of Lies

The religious wackos have weaseled their tentacles in the door of education here in Texas.  The Texas State Board of Education has voted to approve biased and inaccurate textbooks.  The new textbooks will indicate that Moses was one of the founding fathers of our nation.  You remember Moses, the world’s worst tour guide.  He was the guy who wandered around an area you can walk across in about six weeks for forty years
. 
So Charlton, I believe that was Moses first name, instead of parting the Red Sea, parted the Red Coats and helped win the war against the British.  He also gave us the Constitution and Declaration of Independence instead of the Ten Commandments. I’m not sure why Moses didn’t sign the Declaration of Independence, but I believe it was because he was he was ranting against same-sex marriage on the floor of Congress that day. 

Speaking of books, I wrote about this book a while back and with this new infringement from the religious far-right wackos I feel I must recommend it again. It is called Christian Nation: A Novel by Frederic C. Rich.  It is a work of fiction and details what would happen if America really did become a Christian Nation.  It will scare the Holy Ghost out of you.

Here is a quote I recently came across that I thought was appropriate for today’s piece. "Religion is an insult to human dignity. With or without it you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion." ---Steven Weinberg, Professor at the University of Texas and Nobel laureate

My personal opinion is that without a doubt, religion is man’s most destructive creation.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

The Crying Game

The TeaNut Republicans are in a snit, but then again, they are always in a snit.  In fact that is about all they do.  They sure as hell don’t get anything done. They couldn’t pass a bill if they had taken a laxative for a month.  The Republicans don’t govern, they don’t offer solutions, they just say no. This week’s snit is over President Obama using executive action on getting something done about immigration.  They think he should be impeached if he uses it, so let’s take a look at past Presidents use of it to see if Obama is any different.

Oh I see why he is different.  He’s not white. A closer look at the record finds that the last 5 Republican Presidents used executive action 18 times to change immigration policy.  I believe the Republicans golden rule is “Do as I say, not as I do.”

If these assholes really did believe in a smaller government, they would all resign and if the Democrats really wanted to be in power, they would figure out a way to get viable candidates to run and their supporters to actually go vote.



Stay tuned for future adventures.

The World's Oldest Scam....Religion

We have the war on religion, the war on Christmas and whatever else the TeaNut Religious wackos of the world want to declare is under war.  But what we really have is War on Reason because anything that is within reason is suddenly jumped on by these wackos.  Of course these assholes will use anything to use as a smoke screen to take away from talking about real issues and solutions to real problems.

As somebody once said, you can’t reason with a religious wacko because if you could, there would be no religious wackos. Here is an example of religious freedom the way the zealots see it.  The Catholic Church is in a discrimination lawsuit over firing one their teachers at an Indiana school for taking vitro fertilization treatments.  The Church is arguing that its religious liberty rights protect the school from having to go to court at all.  

I realize that I just said this last month but I’m going to recycle it just in case you missed it.

The Pew Foundation has just released a report that says white evangelical Christians feel that they are the most persecuted people in America and at the Values Voter Summit in Washington this past weekend a straw poll of the 2000 attendees said that religious freedom was their number one priority.  What a load of crap. We have more religious freedom than any country on the planet. What they want is the freedom for THEIR religion to be the ONLY religion.

They already have two national holidays and are trying to take over another one. They are doing everything that they can to take over Halloween.  They want to call it the Harvest Festival or the Fall Festival.   I just read an article where they are pushing to have people carve the face of Jesus in their pumpkins. It’s Halloween, you know, spooks, goblins and scary stuff.  I guess the Holy Ghost would work if anyone knew what the Holy Ghost looked like.

There is a church on every corner and they get to spew bullshit on the radio and TV all they want. Don’t get me wrong, they have every right to spew their bullshit, but I have every right not to listen. Every time we turn around they insist that God or Jesus be involved in everything we do from our education system to the government. I for one will be greatly thankful when the rapture gets here and these boneheads will be gone.  

Here is a fine example of evangelical Christian thinking. Christian radio host Rick (I Am Not a Scientist or a Doctor, but I am a Moron) Wiles said on his broadcast last week that Ebola is probably a good thing because it would cleanse the world of gay people, atheists and sluts. Wow Ebola doesn’t kill Christians.  I guess only lions do.

And here are a couple of typical quotes from a pair of pompous, self-righteous, self-proclaimed spokesmen for God:

 “Good Christians, like slaves and soldiers, ask no questions.” ~ Jerry Falwell

"The feminist agenda is not about equal rights for women. It is about a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians." –Pat Robertson


Stay tuned for future adventures.

Take a Hike

Today is National Take a Hike Day.  I have never been one for taking a hike, so I think I will pass. But for all of those folks who are into hiking, I would like to say, “Take a hike.”

Personally I am more of a “take a ride, take a seat, take some time off, take a load off, take a minute, take a step back, take this, take over, take a breath, take a break, take a second look, take care, take me along, take two and call me in the morning,” type guy.  

I never saw the reasons for taking a hike. Once you get there, you just have to turn around and hike back. 
In fact all of this thinking about taking a hike has worn me out. I think I need to take a nap.

Stay tuned for future adventures.