Let's Talk Turkey

 

Now that we have made it through the supposedly scariest holiday of the season, let me remind you that the one coming up is actually the scariest of all.  THANKSGIVING……What you say, Thanksgiving?  Yes, try to clear out the brainwashing we've grown up with about how Thanksgiving is such a grand holiday and truly remember memories of the Thanksgiving dinner with people you really don’t like. 

 

Yes, try to zero in on the brainwashing we’ve grown up with a see if you can’t drum up some mandatory gratitude. This may take some doing if you are still obligated to show up to sit across the table with people who from childhood still either mispronounce your name or don’t know it at all. Uncle Wilburt who always messed up your hair with that stupid grin on his face or Aunt Millie who pinched you on the cheek and asked about school even if you are married and have two children.

When growing up you always visualized that day when you would move away and live too far to attend Thanksgiving dinner.  Ha, according to the Thanksgiving rules,( which I believe are stored somewhere in the vault with your permanent record,) if you still live on the same continent, you are obligated to make Thanksgiving Dinner. (But Mom, it’s eight hundred miles home…..Oh silly, you love driving that car…..But Mom, it’s got 150,000 miles on it….See how reliable it is.) I know that a lot of these people are now dead as the turkey, but they still live in our Thanksgiving memory banks.

And speaking of dinner, why is it always turkey or ham?  We are all in this together so how about meatballs and spaghetti or enchiladas or hot dogs and hamburgers. Bottom line, get you a prescription for anxiety or just load up on valium and head home.  You are locked in……..It’s the law.

And then in less than 24 hours we go from giving the blessing to shouting curse words at our fellow shoppers on Black Friday.  I don’t why we don’t call it Black and Blue Friday.  Black Friday is the most brutal shopping day of the year.

     “Gimmie those sheets or give me death,” can be heard in every department store around the country.  I know some of the stress has been eliminated by on-line shopping, but it is still a shopping nightmare.  And then in a couple of weeks we will begin the war of words over should we say, “Merry Christmas or Happy Holiday”.

 

 

Stay tuned for future adventures.