Some Of This, More Of That

Iowa Senator Joni (I’m Not Very) Ernst is calling for the repeal of Obamacare, abolishing the Department of Education and slashing food stamps. She says the church can take of those things.  In other words, pray that you don’t get sick, pray that you have no need for reading, writing and arithmetic and pray that you will always have something to eat.

Donald (KKK) Trump is wanting to change the rule for immigrants coming into this country. He says they need to have money, a good credit score and health insurance. Evidently there will have to be some changes made to the Statue of Liberty:

It seems that some evangelicals are upset at Trump. They haven’t been upset about him saying, “grab em by the pussy” or locking kids up in cages, but they are mad that at his rally in West Virginia he used the lord’s name in vain.  I’m not sure if he said, “goddamn” or if he spoke Lord Voldemort’s name out loud.  (for those of you not familiar with Harry Potter, you are excused)

The F.B.I. is in the process of raiding Jeffery (I’m Really Hung Now) Epstein’s island in the Caribbean. I’m hoping they bring back the statue that is in front of his house.

Faux News schlock reporter Geraldo (My Brain Is As Empty As Capone’s Vault) Rivera said a few weeks ago that he believes Trump is a racist. Geraldo was evidently stricken with amnesia as he attended a big fund raiser for Trump over the weekend. 

Stay tuned for future adventures.

New Week, Same Ole Stuff

I understand that authorities are still trying to figure out how Jeffery (I Like Them Young) Epstien got the hammer, nails and lumber into his cell to build a hangman’s gallows.

I’ve had three robo calls today telling me that my apple products were defective. Damn, and I just bought those Granny Smiths yesterday.

I must admit I do have a recurring fantasy. I see a huge crowd at one of Trump’s rallies of hate and instead of them chanting “Lock her up”, they are chanting “Shut the fuck up.”

Impeachment inquiries have begun in the House of Representatives held by the Democrats and in the Senate the Republicans say that they are not worried because they are way ahead of the problem.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Friday On My Mind

The Democratic Presidential candidates are in Iowa this week for the Iowa state fair where they will all be eating corn dogs and making their stump speeches. My brain always flashes back to this picture of former Minnesota Congressmoron Michele (I’m Just A Bubble Off) Bachmann.

The CEO of the NRA Wayne (I Only Shoot My Mouth Off) LaPierre called Trump and told him it would be unwise for him to back any kind of gun legislation even though the NRA is losing memberships and are involved with internal fighting among the executives. I gave a little history of the NRA a couple of months ago, but I thought it would appropriate to repeat it.

The NRA started as the National Rifle Association. When they decided to get into politics, they dropped gun safety completely and it became No Rifles Anymore because they were only interested in selling hand guns and assault weapons. Not long after getting into politics they morphed into becoming the National Radical Assholes. When the 2016 election came along, they became Now Rubles Accepted.  And finally, after the story broke that the top leaders and venders were embezzling money from their subscribers, they became Now Robbing Assets.

Talk about putting mental illness and guns together. Republican Senator Pat (Dummy) Toomey won’t support assault weapons because “they are so popular and no more lethal than regular rifles.” Well yes, they are quite popular with those folks who want to kill large numbers of people in a short time. I am pretty sure this guy is Pat’s gun consultant.

The latest polls show that 70% of all voters want assault weapons banned, but don’t hold your breath for that to happen.

This week ICE (Idiots Committing Enslavement) rounded up 680 workers in food processing plants around Mississippi. U.S. Attorney Mike (I Got My Law License At K- Mart) Hurst said, “They were simply enforcing the rule of law in our state.” Of course, it is against the law to hire undocumented workers, but so far none of the employers have been arrested. Could that be because a number of these plants are owned by the Koch brothers?

Word is that Trump is considering a pardon for former Illinois Governor Rod (All Hairdo, No Brains) Blagojevich. Trumpypoo thinks Rod was treated unfairly at his trial because there were no hair stylist on the jury.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

The Day After Hump Day

Biggest hump of the decade, Donald (Little DICK-Tator)Trump flew into EL Paso yesterday without an apology or a check for $569,204.63 for what he owes them from his February rally.  Ole Donnie is a real triple threat kind of guy. Deadbeat racist asshole.

Trump had his Texas lap dog Ted (I Don’t Have A Clue) Cruz with him as they went to the hospital. All eight of the victims from the mass shooting still being treated at the hospital refused to meet with either one of them. I think they had enough pain for one day.

Vice President Mike (If You Are White, You’re Alright) Pence said this the other day, “People need to spend more time on their knees than on the internet.” I am pretty sure Little Mikey spends a lot of time on his knees behind Trump…and in front of him too .come to think of it.

Fox Blabber Mouth Sean (I Just Make This Shit Up) Hannity says he would like to see the perimeter of every school in America secured by retired police and secure every mall in the country.  Let’s see, there are 98,817 public schools in America and approximately 47,000 shopping centers in the country. There is only one way to comment on this.  Sean is a complete moron and so is everyone in his audience.

Sean’s partner-in-lies on Faux News, Tucker (Plenty Of Money, No Integrity) Carlson says “white supremacy” is a hoax.  Evidently Torpid Tucker’s high dollar boarding school didn’t have American History in their curriculum. So far the only person to agree with Clueless Carson is David (I Maybe White, But I’m Not Too Bright) Duke, former Grand Dragon of the KKK.

Little rich white boy Tucker who is an heir to Swanson Frozen Food fortune and worth 20 million also had this to say, “This is a country where the average person is getting poorer and the suicide rate is spiking.” Wait…What happened to the economy is great?  I thought Trump was making America great again. 

And surprise, Tucker suddenly decided he needed to take a little time off and announced he was going on vacation. Could it be a Bill (Bully Boy) O’Reilly vacation? One you don’t come back from.

Stay tuned for future adventures.

Bubbles From My Soapbox

Yes, it is about guns.  It's about assault weapons. There is no reason a private citizen should be able to purchase a military weapon or accessories that can change a rifle to shoot more bullets.  You can’t buy a bazooka or a rocket launcher or a tank, so why should someone be able to buy a AK-47?

I am not advocating taking away anybody’s guns. There are two rifles and two shotguns within 20 feet of where I am typing this blog. Logistically there is no way anybody including the government could take away all the guns in America.

There is approximately 270 million guns in the U.S.  Americans make up less than 5% of the world’s population and yet we have more than 40% of the guns. 

The gun wackos who preach the 2^nd amendment which was written in 1791 need to realize that it is antiquated and totally outdated. The guns back then were muskets and flintlock pistols and I am pretty sure none of the mass shooters were members of a well-regulated militia.  

For all of the Trump supporters  cult-members out there who say Little DICK-Tator Donald has no accountability in these shootings, here is a quote from social psychologist Roy Baueister, “You do not have to give people reasons to be violent, because they already have plenty of reasons. All you have to do is take away their reasons to restrain themselves.” Trump has done this at rally after rally.

  

With Texas being an open-carry-concealed-weapon state, the NRA's motto of, "Takes a good guy with a gun to take out a bad guy with a gun." proves that either there were none of these folks around or these Wanna-be-Dirty Harry's turned into Chicken-Shit-Sam as soon as the first shot was fired and headed for the exit.  

Stay tuned for future adventures.

It's Monday All Over Again

Donald (KKK) Trump weighed in on the mass shootings by dragging the old tired worn out mental health issues into it so the word “gun” is never uttered. Okay, let’s take everyone in the country who owns a gun and put them away in a mental hospital. Problem solved.   

Texas Lt. Governor Dan (Not Only Do I Look Stupid, I Am Stupid) Patrick blamed the mass shootings over the weekend on letting kids play video games. Yeah let’s talk about anything except common sense gun measures. Evidently with Double Dumb Dan, stupidity is a progressive disease.

Texas Senator John (Trump Stooge) Cornyn said he had no idea why the shooter did what he did and went on to say “it could have been homelessness.”  WHAT? This reminds me of the Mark Twain quote. “It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.”

Former Senator Rick (I Need To Be In A) Santorum went on CNN and said the solution to mass shootings was for more people to have guns. My answer to Rick is that he needs to have more brains.  

Kentucky Senator Mitch (Ruskie) McConnell is up for reelection in 2020 and his approval ratings are at a dismal 23%.  Taking a look at Kentucky you can see why. Here are Kentucky’s rankings.

Health care….44

Education…….38

Economy……..39

Moscow Mitch’s new campaign motto is “Mitch McConnell, Kentucky 2020, At Least We’re Not Dead Last.

I understand Moscow Mitch fell and broke a shoulder over the weekend. Maybe a little too much vodka?

Stay tuned for future adventures

Flaky Friday

Well so far today, the girl at Dollar General, the man at the Shell station and the cashier at the grocery store.  What happened to “have a nice day?" 

Donald (KKK) Trump sent his HUD Director Ben (Wake Me Up When It’s Over) Carson to Baltimore to try to slime over his derogatory remarks he made about the city last week.  Bonehead Ben, who is dumb as sack of mud in spite of being a brain surgeon, chose a church property that had lots of boarded up houses in one of the worse neighborhoods in the city to do his press conference.

The church showed up and told Brain Dead Ben he didn’t have permission to do the press conference on their land and to take his dumb ass back to D.C.

News is out that Trumpy's BFF Jeffery (I Like Them Young) Epstein wanted to have his head and penis frozen proving that he really is a DICKHEAD.

Moscow Mitch (Ruskie) McConnell’s Siamese twin Leningrad Lindsey (Lap Dog) Graham ignored Senate rules and rammed through a meaningless bill to please his master.  I’m pretty sure Lap Dog Lindsey thinks Trump will play catch with him on the White House lawn and maybe even scratch the back of his head.

Texas Congressmoron John (Ratso) Ratcliffe has withdrawn his name from being considered for Intelligence Chief. Looking at his political record, this is probably the first intelligent thing the man has ever done in his life.

Remember when Donald (Little DICK-Tator) Trump said “that we will win so much, you’ll get tired of winning.” Well, evidently several Republicans are tired. So far ten Republicans in the House and three Republicans in the Senate are not running for reelection.  I guess they are going back to the place they came from.

Stay tuned for future adventures.